City Park dysFUNction

"Let's go to City Park and ride the rides," my innocent children said.  Being the naive mother that I am, I made arrangements to have a destination playdate with another family.  We all piled into the car and off we went.  The day started out fun with super slide rides and climbing through mazes but then came the kiddie cars. My son wanted to ride the cars so badly but the attendant said an adult had to ride with him.  Now, this seemed like a simple task as the back of the truck was open and we could have both fit easily into the ride.  However, as all 3 year old boys who are inticed by the magical truck ride would be, my son wanted to "drive." Remember, this ride is designed for CHILDREN! The front is enclosed and the only way I could get in was to go "butt first" and kind of shimmy inside. Oh!!!!  The humiliation of that 90 second ride that felt like an eternity. I thought it would never end and that the worst was over...no no!! It had only just begun! I then had to get out.  The best way I can describe the "situation" is the scene from Ace Ventura when he is trying to escape from the mechanical rhino...there was a lot of grunting and maneuvering to get my fat behind out of this midget clown mobile but nonetheless; I made it.  I may have had a concussion and bruises in places that God NEVER intended them to be BUT I did it for my child's happiness.  He better appreciate this aforementioned dedication to his happiness because I promise I will bring this up for years to come!! And before any smarty pants ask, YES, there was a kind soul there who was more than eager to document this event and take pictures but I will not post them.  Mostly because I was making vulgar finger gestures in the most inconspicuous ways I could being that I was on a kiddie ride but also because I will not give anyone the pleasure of seeing me look like Godzilla playing at a Polly Pocket amusement park!